Be honest with yourself for a moment. How would you describe your relationship with Jesus right now?

If the word "lukewarm" comes to mind — if you believe, you go to church sometimes, you pray when life gets hard, but deep down you know you are going through the motions — I want you to stay with me. Because a lukewarm Christian relationship is exactly where I was in January 2017. And cancer changed everything.

WHAT A LUKEWARM CHRISTIAN RELATIONSHIP ACTUALLY FEELS LIKE

There is a particular kind of emptiness that comes with a lukewarm Christian relationship. It is not doubt, exactly. You believe God is real, you show up to church often enough that people probably think you have it together spiritually — but on the inside, something is missing. That deep, daily, seeking-Him-actively kind of relationship with Jesus simply is not there.

Instead, you reach out when you need something and go quiet when life is good. On the outside, it looks like faith. However, on the inside, it feels more like an obligation than a relationship. There is a difference — and deep down, you know it.

That was me. I am being completely honest with you about that because I think it matters. If you are going to understand what God did for me — and what He can do for you — you need to know where I was starting from.

WHEN CANCER INTERRUPTED EVERYTHING

In January 2017, I was diagnosed with a large tumor in my bladder. And just like that, the lukewarm Christian relationship I had been comfortable in for years was about to be completely disrupted.

What happened over the next few weeks was a series of miracles — answered prayers, impossible doors swinging open, connections appearing out of nowhere. A prayer team at Lorrie's father's church began praying specifically for us. People I had never met were interceding on my behalf. Consequently, through those prayers, a connection opened to Dr. Lin at the University of Washington Medical Center — the surgeon we most needed to see and had been told would not be available for five months.

Nevertheless, the moment everything truly shifted — the moment my lukewarm Christian relationship ended and something completely new began — happened on a Friday night in the vegetable section of a Costco.

THE MOMENT EVERYTHING CHANGED

I had just finished an exhausting all-day planning session for a client and stopped at Costco on the way home. While I was standing in the produce aisle, my phone rang. Unknown number.

It was Dr. Lin.

A surgery scheduled for the following Wednesday had just been canceled — something he said rarely happened. As a result, he was calling to offer me that slot. I left my cart, walked to the bread aisle, and fell to my knees. In tears. In Costco.

In that moment, I felt something I cannot fully put into words — God's presence, His warmth, and a peace I had never experienced before. Not in any church service, not in any prayer I had ever prayed on my own. It was real, immediate, and unmistakable. Furthermore, I knew with absolute certainty that He had done this. Not luck. Not timing. God.

That is what it looks like when a lukewarm Christian relationship reaches its turning point. It does not always happen on a mountain or in a sanctuary. Sometimes it happens in a grocery store, on your knees, in tears, when God makes it so undeniable that you have no choice but to go all in.

WHAT GOING ALL IN ACTUALLY MEANS

From that moment forward, I was a different person. Not because I had figured everything out, but because I finally knew — really knew — that Jesus was with me. He had proven it in a way I could not explain away or credit to anything else.

As a result, my relationship with Him changed completely. Rather than reaching out only when I needed something, I started seeking Him every single day — talking to Him, thanking Him, trusting Him with things I would never have handed over before. Going through the motions was no longer enough. In fact, it was no longer possible.

Going all in does not mean you have all the answers. It means you stop pretending you do and start trusting the One who does.

Philippians 4:6-7 puts it this way:

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

That peace is real. I have lived it. And it is available to you too — not after your cancer journey ends, but right now, in the middle of it.

WHERE ARE YOU TODAY?

If you are reading this from inside a lukewarm Christian relationship, I am not here to judge you. I was there, and honestly, most of us have been at some point. Still, I want to invite you to consider: what would it look like to go all in?

Not a performance. Not a checklist. Simply an honest conversation with Jesus — "I need you. I'm done going through the motions. I want the real thing."

He is already there, and He has been there all along — just waiting for you to turn and see Him.

No matter what you are facing on your journey with cancer or in life, remember: you are NEVER ALONE. Jesus and the Holy Spirit are always with you and ready to help. All you have to do is ask, give it all to Jesus, and let him go to work.

LISTEN TO THE PODCAST — My Story Part 2: When God Changed My Life